Do you feel like you are in a rut? Do you catch yourself focusing on the things that are tricky, unfair, or wrong in life? Have you been labeled a pessimist?
Good news! You are not alone. The silent majority tend to focus on the negative. In fact, the human brain is hardwired to bias towards negativity. Research suggests that our ancestors’ fear of potential negative outcomes, like wild animals attacking us, is what made us survive as a species. But without imminent physical dangers, our tendency to focus on the negative no longer serves us.
For us to better recognize negative thinking patterns, we must understand how they work. Our mind is made up of two parts, the conscious and the sub-conscious, The conscious part of our mind is responsible for logic and reasoning, and a good portion of our negative thoughts. This part controls our voluntary actions, like lifting our arms.
The subconscious part is responsible for all our involuntary actions, for example breathing. When we learn a new skill, like driving, our conscious part is actively processing what to do. Once we became proficient at driving, we no longer had to deliberately think what we did when we came to a red light; our subconscious took over and our reaction was automatic. The information was stored in our memory—our subconscious.
Too often, our minds are fed with negative information. If we simply believe every thought that enters our mind, without challenging it, we run the risk of storing these thoughts in our subconscious as our reality. Becoming mindful of what we think about is the crucial first step to stop producing persistent negative thoughts.
But what if how you think is not the problem? What if you have a negative spouse, co-worker or friend? How does spending time with negative company, affect you?
Apart from feeling drained by spending time with people who create a negative atmosphere - you might pick up some more serious problems, like health issues. The more you hang around negative people, the more you will become like them. We start to imitate mannerisms, facial expressions and even tone of voice of those we associate with. But more important than that, we adopt their mental state as well. Human beings are empathic creatures, so we ‘feel’ for the people closest to us; this suggests that negativity is contagious.
Most people are aware that stress can produce physical symptoms like an upset stomach, but research suggests that toxic thoughts can have incredible negative effects on your health. Did you know:
· high levels of cynicism can lead to a greater risk of dementia and heart disease.
· hostility, chronic stress and depressive symptoms can be linked to strokes.
· people who suffer from depression have a higher risk for type 2 diabetes and disability later in life.
Our thoughts and emotions have widespread effects on processes like metabolism, immune function and hormone release. Even a small amount of negative brain activity can lead to a weakened immune system.
Choosing to have a positive outlook, as well as being selective in who you spent time with, is therefore not only beneficial to your mind but also to your health and wellness.
Because of our social nature, it can be challenging to only interact with optimistic people. While we can’t disregard the more negatively tuned co-worker or friend, there are ways to deal with negatively disposed people. Here are some strategies:
· Identify these people who frequently display negativity traits.
· Recognize how they impact your viewpoint.
· Learn to manage their input in your life.
If you want to increase your overall life satisfaction, it is in your best interest to learn how to handle negatively inclined people.
1. Prepare yourself to deal with negativity:
· Negativity can suck the optimism out of you.
· Be mindful, self-aware, content and confident in your outlook.
· Prepare yourself for a more discouraging atmosphere.
2. Start each day in a positive way:
· Spend 5 minutes every morning focusing on things worth celebrating in your life.
· Look for something positive each day, even if some days you have to look a little harder.
· Appreciate the small miracles.
· Meditate on all the good things in your life.
· Gratitude promotes health & happiness.
3. Set boundaries:
· Limit the time you spent with negativity.
· Nurture yourself and set some healthy emotional space between you and the negativity.
· Garbage in = garbage out. Eat healthy, sleep enough and exercise regularly.
· Don’t let negativity rub off on you.
4. Don’t take things personally:
· Remember to challenge the toxic thoughts (comments) that enter your mind.
· Even if negativity catch you off-guard, keep in mind you can control how you react.
· Smile and remain detached!
Psychologists argue that fostering positivity isn't a talent. It takes effort and dedication, but optimism is a skill that can be learned. It is certainly a state of mind that is well worth investing in.
Would you like practical tools and tips to promote a more positive state of mind? Drop a message in the comment box below: